Patience

The past few months at work have become incredibly frustrating for me. I had mistakingly believed that the challenges provided by this new role and the increased responsibility would make me more excited about working, but it's been the complete opposite. Whereas before I had no clue what I was doing, now I am becoming an expert on something which holds no interest for me. At the end of the day I am left questioning whether my desire to move to alternative energy is due to interest in it or just a complete lack of interest in natural gas liquids. Don't get me wrong, understanding how the oil and gas market works is critical to understanding how alternative sources of energy can be most effective, but helping a huge oil company maximize profits was not my ideal job.

And here is why patience comes into play. I came here because their AE division was the best of all the super majors. They spent the most money, invested the most resources, and wanted to be leaders in the field. I came knowing that it would be at least a year before I would have the opportunity to move into that area of the company. But with the reorg that year is turning into three. Managers who were fully supportive before are now telling me that I will most likely have to wait, and that even at the end of three years it might still be difficult to move. This waiting game, with no clear end in sight, and not even a clear path to follow is frustrating. I don't mind working hard for something that is far off in the future. I don't mind working hard for something that is so far off in the future that it cannot even be seen. What I don't like is working hard for something I can't see without knowing if I'm even on the right path. Unfortunately that's how things feel right now. I know where I want to be and what I want to do. Is what I am doing right now going to get me there?